text ↪ un: dostoevsky

[dissemblance]

Can we all take a moment to admire the fact that 2801 technology still supports emoji functionality? 🤩 👍 🕷 💁 🩰 💫 🍆 🧊 💅 👁‍🗨 🎯 🤡 🔋 🐈 💲 🧙‍♀️ 🐦💋 🐜 👽 🕶 ⚡ 🕵🏻‍♀️ 💦 💦 💦

It seems like they're pretty set on calling us 'Hatchlings', so... hello, fellow Hatchlings, I'd like to play a game.

Two truths and a lie. I'll start.

  ① Starbucks makes the best lattes.
  ② I've never watched All Dogs Go To Heaven all the way through.
  ③ My birthdate is May 21st. What year? Every year. 😉😉😉 But my party in 2018 was 🔥🔥🔥.

Comments

[dissemblance]

You think you should be rubbing shoulders with Benjamin Franklin?

I'm impressed by the ego.

[freightcars]

I was thinking more like those people that where the shorts and lick stamps all day

[dissemblance]

Sounds like somebody's discovered fetish porn.

[freightcars]

Is that seriously a thing? I honestly can't tell anymore.

[dissemblance]

You really don't get to pull that 'the 1930s were a pure and innocent time' bullshit with me, cowboy.

[freightcars]

hell no, I'm not the catholic one
you shoulda seen the drag shows
I meant post office porn
who the hell gets that into letters and knee shorts

[dissemblance]

Oh, please, Mister Postman... I've got a slot you can put your... mail into...

Easier than you'd expect.

[freightcars]

That's
Some things make me want to go back into the freezer
That's on the list