text ↪ un: dostoevsky

[dissemblance]

Can we all take a moment to admire the fact that 2801 technology still supports emoji functionality? 🤩 👍 🕷 💁 🩰 💫 🍆 🧊 💅 👁‍🗨 🎯 🤡 🔋 🐈 💲 🧙‍♀️ 🐦💋 🐜 👽 🕶 ⚡ 🕵🏻‍♀️ 💦 💦 💦

It seems like they're pretty set on calling us 'Hatchlings', so... hello, fellow Hatchlings, I'd like to play a game.

Two truths and a lie. I'll start.

  ① Starbucks makes the best lattes.
  ② I've never watched All Dogs Go To Heaven all the way through.
  ③ My birthdate is May 21st. What year? Every year. 😉😉😉 But my party in 2018 was 🔥🔥🔥.

Comments

@weirdshit

[brosbeforeprose]

"2. The craziest drink I ever had was a shot that included snake innards"

I see you've been to my local inn.

I'm sorry, that's unfair.
It was an animal tooth and it was only one time.

I don't know for sure that 1 is the lie, but I want the others to be true, so it's my guess all the same.

[unclesam]

1 is true in sentiment, but not so much reality. 2 & 3 are entirely correct.
the shot was horrid. yours any better?
the alligator's named miss olive. pillar of the community, really.

[brosbeforeprose]

I have to ask, what makes a superhero any more super than your regular run of the mill hero?

[Question for the ages.]

Tasted a bit sweet, kind of earthy. And then like blood when it cut my tongue. In some parts, they'd call "sweet, a little earthy, with a tang of blood" the "bouquet" and charge extra.

And how did you happen to meet Miss Olive?

[unclesam]

it's all about the costumes and gimmicks, man

[ true story ]

alright you know what, you win that. at least the snake bits went down the hatch in one gulp.

oh everyone knows where she usually lurks. teach your kids where not to stick their arms in the water, y'know.

[brosbeforeprose]

I'm making notes as we speak.
Not that I'm the heroic type, I'm more the man behind the hero making sure the wind blows their hair back just right and making sure the story's going to sound good at the bar later.

I don't know, I think the snake guts would make a second appearance if I'd drunk them.

[unclesam]

oh you the hype man, running pr and marketing, yeah?

[ memo to self: do not talk about the actual superhero shit in front of this guy. he doesn't wanna give the wrong impression there. ]

it was a close call, I'll admit that

[brosbeforeprose]

That makes me sound like a professional. I just like spinning a good tale. And occasionally I shoot people. When I have a sodding crossbow to do it with.

[He hasn't found his Bianca yet, and he promises he's not bitter about it.

No, that's a lie. He is bitter. How dare the mysterious forces of the universe not give him Biance right in his hand when he arrives.]

So what kind of superheroing do you see and/or do? On a scale of 'rescuing cats from trees' to 'delivering the whole world from unimaginable peril'.

[unclesam]

[ crossbow... Sam's about to judge the antiquity when he remembers he's throwing a big shield like a frisbee as his weapon of choice these days.

it occurs to him that taking up the mantle meant giving up all rights to judge other strange weapon choices. damnit. ]

shockingly? kinda both. I mean, world ending plots are practically a dime a dozen. what kinda monster wouldn't stop for a little kid needing a cat saved, though?

[brosbeforeprose]

[Look here, that crossbow is super high tech where he's from! The height of modern technology!]

It's true, no one can make that look good. A hero needs to stop for every adorable animal in peril. The ugly ones, you can get away with. No one wants to hear a tale of a nug up a tree, trust me.

It sounds like you have some stories to tell.