text ↪ un: dostoevsky

[dissemblance]

Can we all take a moment to admire the fact that 2801 technology still supports emoji functionality? 🤩 👍 🕷 💁 🩰 💫 🍆 🧊 💅 👁‍🗨 🎯 🤡 🔋 🐈 💲 🧙‍♀️ 🐦💋 🐜 👽 🕶 ⚡ 🕵🏻‍♀️ 💦 💦 💦

It seems like they're pretty set on calling us 'Hatchlings', so... hello, fellow Hatchlings, I'd like to play a game.

Two truths and a lie. I'll start.

  ① Starbucks makes the best lattes.
  ② I've never watched All Dogs Go To Heaven all the way through.
  ③ My birthdate is May 21st. What year? Every year. 😉😉😉 But my party in 2018 was 🔥🔥🔥.

Comments

[wittingly]

My god
I just realized

You're a hipster
A hipster with a smokescreen chest and distraction shoulder holsters

I can't believe I didn't see it before

[wittingly]

no, we had an apocalypse, but close guess

[cicatrize]

Oh, that old world's end excuse.
What was it? Plague, famine, asteroid?

1/?

[nonscriptum]

[nonscriptum]

[nonscriptum]

[wittingly]

Aliens

My degrees didn't really meet their requirements

[nonscriptum]

[nonscriptum]

[nonscriptum]

You take that back.

[wittingly]

Oh, you want me to take it back?
Okay, sure, I'll take it back. Should I take it back to Oaxaca which is obviously the ONLY place with valid mezcal since they made before it was cool, or is the VHS store with vintage Buster Keaton tapes far enough?

You did ironic close up magic for me one time

The signs have been here all along

[cicatrize]

Aliens. Huh.
Not the twist I was expecting.
And yet you survived to extraterrestrial culling, so your science-y education must've provided some use, beverage connoisseurship aside.

[wittingly]

it came in handy eventually, but it definitely wasn't my quick thinking and badass impulses that saved me from the initial culling

that credit goes to my stoned TA

MA BOI

[cicatrize]

Somehow I missed the scripture with "and the baked shall inherit the Earth".

[dissemblance]

Presidents, prime ministers, a few dictators for fun and flavor.

From what I know about the rest of the universe, that's pretty par for the course. But then, I'm from Earth, like the Adamant's survivors.

never 4get

[wittingly]

meek was a mistranslation, don't worry, we were just as confused as you are

[dissemblance]

I think I speak for all of us when I say 'what's a cockatrice'? 😋

Of all the lies you could have told about your sibling, I feel like that one has to be the most benign. Family guy, huh?

[nonscriptum]

That's not fair, hipster implies I made these choices intentionally to look cool, I grew up in Central and South America because we immigrated illegally when I was a kid and the tapes came from a charity store because the headmaster at the orphanage was nice enough to give them to me for Christmas.

[dissemblance]

Men can use emojis too, you know.

[wittingly]

I can't believe you just Christmas Orphan shamed me

I also can't believe it worked, I have the sudden impulse to hold you and buy you a pony

[dissemblance]

Yes. 😌 It's one of my favs.

（ in all honesty, all three are lies. but they're deliberate ones just the same, and which she selects to serve as 'true' doesn't matter in the long run. ）

I'm going with the evil scientist one. You just don't seem the type.

（ she's fascinated by that one about food, but — the spy in her isn't going to pivot away from evil scientists. ）

[nonscriptum]

You called me a hipster. You, the sentient plaid flannel shirt.

[dissemblance]

And if I knew what a circle mage was, I might agree. 😉

So, what I'm hearing is you're either a very bad priest or a very good writer... care to fill me in?

[wittingly]

yeah, no wonder you like me

it's like looking into a mirror

you look at my flannel shirt and my MP3 player but you're really seeing YOURSELF looking back

it's okay, take your time, come to terms, I'm here for you during this tumultuous journey of self-acceptance

[dissemblance]

How can someone with such good taste in movies have such bad taste in lattes?